Our Command Bunker and Emma Peel's Voice

Pedro had a central command hut built between Greenhouse One and Greenhouse Two. We call it our Command Bunker and it has two or three comfortable chairs on rollers in front of an electronic console filled with gauges, dials, video monitors, and a microphone for an intercom system that allows Pedro or myself to speak to our staff in any of the Greenhouses.

Cameras in the three greenhouses observe the overall progress of the work of growing roses, and they are equipped with remote controls that allow us to zoom in on any particular part of the operation. Pedro insisted on putting in an alarm system, in case we’re away from the observation console and need to attend to any emergencies.

Instead of having annoying sounds, such as those car alarms that drive me up the wall, this alarm system works with a series of code colors, such as those used in hospitals. In order not to unduly alarm the staff, a very pleasant computer voice over the intercom says something like “Code Orange in Greenhouse Two.” Pedro had all of us memorize what the different colors indicate. The Orange message, if it were for real, would mean that the pump system has failed in Greenhouse Two.

All data and video images are recorded digitally and kept in the memory of our master computer for future reference. It all sounds a bit Big Brotherish to me, but Pedro swears that as long as we footed the bill to have our three greenhouses fully automated, the additional expense of centralized observation and the recording of data is warranted. “This might save us a lot of money in the long run,” is how he defends our use of this futuristic technology.

One day last week we were admiring the tremendous growth spurt of our Granada and Ambience rose bushes in Greenhouse Three, when the computer voice I’ve nicknamed Emma (for Emma Peel from that old British TV show, "The Avengers.") pleasantly informed us that Greenhouse One was experiencing a Code Yellow. I didn’t need my pocket guide to figure out that this meant that the measurements of our nutrient mix were all of a sudden incorrect.

Pedro and I rushed over to Greenhouse One, and checked the readings on the wall console. In addition to the Master Console in the Command Bunker, each greenhouse also has a wall console where you can check the readings from all the electronic sensors strategically placed throughout the greenhouse. These measure pH, EC, ppm, nutrient mix temp, room temperature, humidity, light levels in lumens, lux, and foot candles, color temp in Kelvin, total wattage, amperes, and voltage being used, parts per million of carbon dioxide in the air,
etc.

According to the readings, the pH of our nutrient mix was way off. For hydroponic roses the best acid-alkaline balance is between 5.6 and 5.8 and now it was reading 6.7 pH. Since 7.0 pH is neutral, the reservoir must have been almost completely emptied of nutrient mix and been flushed with water. Although we do empty the used mix each week and flush with water, this exchange wasn’t due for another couple of days.

Our plant nutrients—consisting of our basic fert, Iguana Juice Grow; the richly organic supplements Grandma Enggy’s Humic Acid, and Fulvic Acid; the purely natural source of all essential B-Vitamins, Organic B; the root colonizers Piranha, Tarantula, and Voodoo Juice; as well as other Advanced Nutrients products containing enzymes, carbohydrates, potassium silicates and calcium-magnesium—are pre-mixed in a special tank.

This mixing takes place the night before the nutrient solution is poured into the main reservoir of our multi-bucket ebb and flow hydroponic system for growing roses. Each day the roses suck up about 20% of the solution in the reservoir and the reservoir is automatically topped up with water. What happened in Greenhouse One is that through a faulty timer the reservoir was almost completely drained of solution and topped up with pure water.

This procedure threw off every single measurement, including pH, EC, ppm, and the nutrient mix temp. Luckily, the system is equipped with a manual override, so Pedro and I are able to make corrections, whenever they’re necessary. We mixed up another batch of nutrient solution and took several pH readings, one half hour apart. After we got the exact reading of 5.7 pH twice in a row, we knew that the solution was stable.

We allowed it to stand overnight, just to give the Barricade a chance to dissolve completely. Then we took another pH reading and made sure that our EC reading was appropriate for the week of vegetative growth that our Blue Girl and Julia’s Rose bushes were experiencing.

Finally, we drained the reservoir of the water that was put in there by mistake and replaced it with the proper nutrient solution. Luckily, no harm was done since it never hurts to irrigate our roses just with water. Then Pedro boosted the ppm a tiny bit, just to make sure that our roses would get ample food to grow and produce award-winning blooms.